90 Comments

I love this, Kelcey! So powerful! Personally I create for all three—the next generation, myself as a girl, and me as a woman—they’re not mutually exclusive in my mind. But I 100% get what you’re saying about the pressure women feel to put others first.

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That's a great way to think of it, Katharine! It's not like I'm NOT creating for others, after all :) But I love thinking of creating for all three (or more).

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i like this a lot! two for you, one for them! (all for all!)

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YES!!! I wish there was a bigger font to use here in the comments. :-) I have felt this my whole life. Such a great insight!

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Thanks, Anne! That's how I felt reading that twitter thread! I mostly took her ideas :)

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I completely agree with this. It never has to be about something else...it can be about you.

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Yes! Thanks, Martha! (and thanks for the fab zine!) :)

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It definitely does *not* sound terrible for you to say that you didn't become a writer for some unknown future little girl. Not to me, anyway.

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Thanks, B.A. I originally added an asterisk that said: "and if it does [sound terrible], it's probably because I'm a woman!" I appreciate you saying this!

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Apr 6Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Yes, exactly! The only reason it “sounds terrible” is the exact point you’re making! Thank you for this profound work!

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Yes! Thank you, Amanda!

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This. The imperative to be a Role Model is still very close to the view of a woman as primarily a nurturing, selfless being.

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Yep. Alas. ❤️

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Apr 1Liked by Kelcey Ervick

I appreciate this.

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I suspect that you're in the thick of it!

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Apr 4Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Yes! But also because I made a comic a few years ago about how the pressure to have a baby felt like a judgment by others that I had had my time to “become something” and now it was time to pass that potential to someone else. Your message feels in a similar vein. Making a comic about it made me not worry about it anymore 😊 but I think there’s still something to it!

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Whoa, that's so problematic! Would love to see your comic!

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Mar 31Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Wonderful! What an important insight!

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Thanks, Elizabeth!

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I am living for all of the eclipse references you wove in here! Genius post. 🌒

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THANK YOU FOR NOTICING!!! (I think you're the first to say something!) 😁✨

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Yes yes yes!!!

I talk a lot about being selfish but like good selfish. E.g. I took a Selfish Sabbatical for a summer, where I only did things for me, without thinking of others, without apology or hesitation. Sum: it was magical. (If piqued ➡️ https://macncheeseproductions.com/im-on-a-selfish-sabbatical/ )

And I finally started sharing the truth about why I do what I do -- yes, to support others. But primarily, to support myself (in all the ways).

I wish more women + POCs + non size twos + any other group who silences themselves would unapologetically and proudly take up space.

"Let them be their own why" — beautifully said and illustrated. Love your work!

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I love that idea of the selfish sabbatical! I wish "selfish" didn't have a negative connotation. We'e managed to make "self-care" positive...can we make "selfish" positive? But yes, we need to more unapologetically do our thing and take up space!

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Totally agree on the "selfish" thought.

For awhile, I tried to come up with a different term to use that wasn't steeped in negativity. Then I decided I really liked the term and to simply teach the world to view and use it differently. 😄 Big task and got a lot of work to do and miles to travel but... tryingggggg!

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Good call! I'll support you! 😁

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I love this!!! My first career was as a hair salon owner. It was creative, joyful, collaborative and my role was to serve my client. Then I went into coaching. I’ve had a solid coaching business for 15 years. I’ve focused on helping people realize their calling. Real, lovely purpose driven work. A few years ago I started feeling burnt out and realized that my calling to be a writer went by the wayside. So I really dug in. I thought I’d write a book, but I wrote a one woman show. Throughout the show are these themes you’re pointing to. But the writing of the show is this very thing. I did it for me. I want to perform it for me. I want to write books for me. I want to succeed for MY little girl, my younger self who learned that her ambitions should be wrapped up in being of service to others, instead of in service to her own pleasure and delight. I still believe this world needs more people to prioritize the collective over the individual, but part of doing that is shifting this collective cultural narrative that women’s pursuits should exclude their own desires, pleasures and personal ambitions. Thanks for this great art.

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Love this: "I thought I’d write a book, but I wrote a one woman show." So great! And yes you are so right that we need to prioritize the collective and that part of that is shifting the narrative for women. Thanks for articulating that!

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Apr 3Liked by Kelcey Ervick

I can’t ❤️ this enough. I’ve been thinking my Why is Me. And reading this helped me remember that my 9 year old self wrote that my future plans were to be an artist. So, 50+ years later, it is for all of me.

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Yes! Honor that 9 yo YOU!

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Apr 3Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Absolutely 💯

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I love everything about this. Thank you so much.

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Thank you for saying so!

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Apr 1Liked by Kelcey Ervick

You are so amazing. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. And I appreciate and resonate with the way you’ve handwritten everything, too. Thank you!

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Wow, thank you! My poor hand is sore from writing and drawing this whole thing yesterday, so I'm glad you like it! 😂

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Aug 11Liked by Kelcey Ervick

LOVE THIS!! Thank you for making it explicit!

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Thanks, Marion!

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May 12Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Thank you so much Kelcey! I just found your page today and I’m loving it! 🧡

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Thank you, Lindsay! So nice to hear!

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May 5Liked by Kelcey Ervick

Hot damn THIS IS SO GOOD AND SOOOOOO IMPORTANT! Let's collectively stop making grown ass adult women invisiible!!! Our efforts and achievements MATTER. (Clearly I have feelings about this)

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Yesssss!!! (I obviously have feelings about it too! That's why the tweets I quoted resonated so much!)

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